wait, who am i kidding?

i would die to base my impending career to something related to editorship, i would trade my soul to work at a magazine. not just any magazine, though; but i guess we all have to start somewhere. the frenzied atmosphere, the constant challenge, the brainstorming, the crazy deadlines, the non-stop flurry of activities … i would be in freakin’ heaven :)

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I’M SUPER EXCITED!!! :)))

upcoming tattoo plans! all i need now is … more cash. and my birthday’s coming up so i’m expecting more moolah coming my way. thank you daddy and mum; you guys don’t know it yet but i’m gonna be very greedy with my 18th birthday present this year ;) which i rightfully deserve, because it’s been a pretty awesome good okay academic year if i do say so myself; plus (sadly, this isn’t a joke) i’ve never asked for anything at all for like, the past seventeen years :D

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Boys Like Girls feat Taylor Swift –
Two Is Better Than One.

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i know. i’m listening to the sappiest song of the year, sung by the two most unlikely combination of artists — one a punk pop boy band, another a teenage country singer; AND the version of the video clip i linked above is one incorporated into the upcoming New Moon movie trailer. what the eff. i must be getting soft. on a similar note, it’s been another shit day. i never should have rolled out of bed this afternoon. i want to go home. here’s a question: if you care so much, what you doing NOT being here? what is this? Make Su Ann’s Life A Living Hell Week?

but whatever.

things can’t get any worse :)

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it’s been a shit day … until i stumbled onto this really cute website: mydadisafob.com, where people posted in adorable, funny, loving stuff about their Asian FOB dads. check the site out :) it made me smile, laugh, and cry a little bit. Daddy’s Little Girls all around the world would probably love the site, like i do.

here’s my story, then:

last year, when SPM was just around the corner, my dad used to send me short SMS-es while he was away to, erm, encourage me to study :)

“dear, time to hit d books and take ur revision seriously. take care, aim and plan ur own future. time wait 4 nobody. u don have 2 b perfect, but at least have 2 strive 4 d best in ur coming SPM. show ur potential cos u r d smartest in our family, let daddy be proud of u. k whatever u do daddy shall fully support. take good care. love, dad.”

and that’s why i love my dad :)

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my head is pounding like crazy. i woke up retching, puking out liquid and bile. because i did not eat last night, and proceeded to drink. more than usual. i distinctly remember some guy telling me brightly, “it’s great you didn’t eat! you’ll get drunk faster.” thanks. enlightening advice. i think i may have a fever.

ohmygod i feel like shite.

bye.

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this morning,

i woke up in my own bed. wrote a long blog update, and worked on it for 53 minutes. until i decided it wasn’t quite right, and hit ‘delete’. my mom cooked lunch for me — chicken curry, and omelets :) this time, i didn’t just throw the food down the drain. i finished the whole thing up, and then some. my sister woke up, and raided my closet. i packed my clothes, and headed for the door. on my way out.

tonight,

i’m going out, to some random bar. there, i’ll meet friends, and maybe make new ones. there will be drinks. there will be cigarettes. and after all the pictures are taken, frozen in memory, after all the hugs are exchanged, after we all have had our suitable share of fun; we will leave. i’ll leave. and return, to this new place, this relatively strange place. it’s not home, not like the one in cheras.

but this is where i will fall asleep tonight, content :)

and maybe that’s really all that matters right now.

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hello!

never thought i’d say this, but home sweet home :)

and tonight, i’m staying in. i’m absolutely worn out applying for jobs :) i’ve completed forms for coffeebean, guess, naf naf, british india, esprit, liz claiborne, and … i really can’t remember. for a high end fashion label, naf naf sure pays pretty shitty salaries for part-timers: rm5/hour. right. anyways, i don’t know. i know i should dabble more in events (better pay, obviously), but … OH! there’s also an internship available: “a well established company currently looking for … uni/college internship students, preferably majoring in Mass Comm/PR … to assist with all editorial job tasks.” age limit is 18 to 23 years old :( i think i’ll give them a call anyways, despite the shitty pay :)

pointless entry, i know.

ANTM on the telly! :)

goodnight!

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behold:

behind the scenes — studying for our last paper, social psychology at bobby’s place.

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#1.

hello there. i can see you through my rolled-up handwritten notes summary of 11 bloody psych chapters, can you see me? :)

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#2.

okay, focus! i still need to make notes for another 2 chapters! :(

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#3.

thou shalt not fall asleep. thou shalt not fall asleep. thou shalt not … what?

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#4.

go away! stop taking pics of me! i’m studying very hard :(

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#5.

see!

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#6.

oh hell. i give up. NOW GIVE ME THAT CAMERA! i shall take my own pictures! :D

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#7.

you know, at this point i think i was actually done making notes. or maybe i was taking a break. whatever.

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#8.

ho hum.

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#9.

you know right. i actually DID studied very, very hard before i got distracted by the camera. i made my own notes for crying out loud! who makes notes anymore! and clutch them tearfully three minutes before entering the exam hall … anyways.

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#10.

a few hours before exam: how now brown cow?

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#11.

i feel like harry potter, who lived in the cupboard under the stairs. except there’s no cupboard, and i’m no wizard.

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#12.

spot the trolley! it’s stolen :D

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#13.

i think at this point, someone yelled, “SU ANN WHERE ARE YOU?!”

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#14.

“i’m hereeee! :( trying. to. keep. the stairs. from falling!!”

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#15.

“i is sexcited! i can has cheeseburger! nom nom nom.“

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#16.

okay running out of witty comments.

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#17.

i’m off!

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btw, the psych exam wasn’t that terrible in hindsight.

and there are 17 pictures because i’m 17.

goodnight :)

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i don’t know which is worse:

for a person to have completely, utterly biased, pro-gov political beliefs; … or for a person to remain ignorant of the developments of this country, not give a shit about anything and have no political stand at all.

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edit:

oh, it’s a little too late, but i wish you all hindus a happy deepavali :)

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